1 Year

Dear God,

It has been one year since this incident happened...
I can't deny that you gave me peace when trouble first showed up...but unfortunately this state of "peace" didn't last long..
It has been a hard year for me and for those around me ...
Confusion...thoughts...fears...disbelief...
The past 12 months changed a lot in me...
I am afraid I have mutated to a new "me"...
The "aftermath" was not easy at all...
I keep asking and thinking how could it have been if things never went wrong...
Sometimes I have hopes in a better future...many times I just feel lost...
I don't want much..I don't ask for much..
I want a simple normal life...I am getting tired of being "special"...
I need to see my simple dream coming true...
I wish I can feel successful so that one day I can look back and have a smile on my face ...
I know that all this is part of your "plan"...
I just don't understand it ...
Even after 1 year...I failed to understand it